....Casey Anthony's miraculous good luck.
Who knew you could get away with murder - and even avoid the death penalty* and get out of jail next week on time served - by first performing your own investigation - which, according to Casey, "is stupid" - into your missing daughter's whereabouts, then by telling a series of lies such as:
"I don't know where she is so back to partyin'/sleepin' over my imaginary rich boyfriend's place, see ya..."
"'Zanny' rhymes with 'nanny' so that's who took her now ya'll let me outta jail - what about meeeeeeeee!11?1!1"...
"Me and dad let her drown on accident - then I panicked and made my dad, who 'touches me' but not like ya think, cover it up as a murder 'cause a 'murder' always sounds better than an 'accident' so can I pleeeeeease go back to the nightclub now there's a Hard Bod contest this Friday and I'm a Perfect 10 kthnxbai" all while acting as spoiled-brat pouty and remorseless as your 2 year old after he spills his sippy cup on your freshly mopped floor?
So with a few "not guilty" verdicts Casey's gone from "accused murderess" to Patron Saint of all parents trying to turn DCF and law enforcement into one big fucking joke in the space of one week.
Casey's obviously "not my kind of people" and I think my attitude speaks for itself. But if you're as outraged as I am at the first point - that "doin' your own investigation" violates no particular law (which was one among several factors that resulted in Caylee's body being so badly decomposed by the time it was found that the prosecution couldn't garner enough evidence from it to remove any shadow of doubt for the jury's benefit) - then sign this petition and let's make sure it can never happen - without consequence to the parent who pulls such a stunt - again. Do it for Caylee and for every child in this nation who cannot speak for nor defend themselves in the throes of such horror.
*For the record, I'm against the death penalty and this case gives me yet another reason - the thought of putting this little swine to death probably wracked the jury (mainly comprised of women, and us women do tend to be a little more touchy-feely than men on the issue) with so much guilt they couldn't go through with what might have otherwise been straight guilty verdicts on all counts.